Got my hair styled and I no longer look like a “single soccer mom”!

Two weeks ago, I finally redeemed Dan’s Valentine’s Day gift! For those who don’t know, I had a pixie cut last summer. While it was nice, the growing out phase was horrendous! I began to feel very self conscious and unhappy with my hair but I was also very cheap and couldn’t justify spending $100+ at a salon but also didn’t trust the Asians enough to fix what little hair I had grown out.

(I say Asians because they generally offer very cheap haircuts but can be a hit or miss).

So, I spent months and months complaining to Dan (lol) until on Valentine’s Day, he decided to get a gift card to a very fancy salon to finally get my hair fixed!


My appointment was at 12PM at Joey Scandizzo Salon in South Yarra. First impression of the salon? Holy cow, did my self confidence plummet!

EVERYONE HAD VERY BEAUTIFUL HAIR. EVERYONE. EVERYONE!

Behind me were rows and rows of awards this salon has won. They specialize in celebrity hairdos as well. The salon itself was grand and super beautiful and clean – soooo different from the usual Asian salons I go to.

You know it’s a fancy place when they hire dedicated hair washers. I kid you not – I’m so use to the stylist washing my hair before cutting it so I was taken back that they had someone else wash my hair before guiding me to my stylist’s chair.

Unfortunately, I forgot my stylist’s name but he gave me heaps of confidence back. I sat down and told him my life story and why I felt horrible about my hair. I told him I was looking for something that is easy to maintain (aka wake up and brush my hair), and something that I can just grow out without worrying that it would lose its shape again.

He instantly said – “bob”, especially given my hair length as well. He showed me a few styles he think I can pull off but they were waaaay too edgy – also, you know it’s a fancy salon when they do and suggest edgy looks rather than classic, safe styles.

We joked about my hair and be basically said “Your hair makes you look like a single soccer mom from the 80’s.”

Ouch, but also true and here’s why:

LIKE, SERIOUSLY… DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I HATE MY HAIR?!

I basically had a weird mullet thing and when I got to the gym and sweat, it basically warps around my neck. Also, the tiny little ponytail that I do at the gym is ugly af.


For someone that usually goes to cheap salons, holy crap did I noticed the difference in technique when my stylist was saving me. It’s soooo much more different than the usual techniques I see at the cheap salons do – seriously, how is it that they all have the same technique but fancy pants salons each has their own techniques to cutting hair?

All in all, my session took about 1.5 hours to finish and stylized. Leaving the salon, I felt soooo much comfortable having people look at me and just fell in love with my hair again. I no longer fuss about it and I’m no longer sinking in money in products that claims they help promote growth. I’m content enough to wait patiently now.

Claiming my Confidence Back

If you know me in real life, you’ll probably laugh and couldn’t believe that I was once often described as outgoing, fierce, confident, and even intimidating.

Shit, I can’t believe my peers used to describe as that as well!

Now, I’m often told I’m quiet. And you know, I wasn’t born loud and confident either. I was born a quiet and shy person and only started to come out of my shell when I got a job at Best Buy as a sales associate shortly after high school. Ever since that job, I felt like a different person but since turning 24, I sort of fell back to my old ways.

I’m quiet. I’m shy. I care about what people think. I don’t speak with my true voice. I hide my thoughts and opinions. I look down at the sidewalk when I walk. I don’t take as many selfies as I used to, or post videos. I get self-conscious and confused.

That’s not who I am. That was who I was back in high school.

A few months ago, shit hit the fan with Dan and our mutual friends group. I felt really betrayed by everyone in our group and I had enough of that “it wasn’t my place to tell you” bullshit.

During my recovery process, I felt like I needed an answer to the final question from this one girl in our group. I have put it off for nearly a month because I was afraid of her. I was afraid of what she would think about the whole situation. I was afraid of any potential clap back she might give me. I was afraid that she’ll talk behind my back and tell everyone how stupid she thinks I am.

But, I did it anyways and even when she was telling me the answer that I needed to move on and heal, I was still afraid of what she thought and felt about me and the whole situation.

During the recovery process, I also deleted my Facebook and Instagram, and even then I was still afraid and worried about what she would think of my actions. And it’s not just her, I was also afraid of another person in the group. I was scared that they’ll call me out for my actions, calling me immature and dumb. I was prepared to apologize for “going rogue” if I ever decide to log back into FB and Insta.

A few days ago, I saw this quote on Reddit and it hit home.

Why did I care so damn much about what this girl thinks of me? Why did I feel like I needed her approval in my life? If I wanted to delete my social media profiles, I shouldn’t have to explain or apologize why I did it. If she wants to tell people how much drama I am causing in the group, then go be it. I just didn’t know why I cared and worried over that. And it’s not just her but everyone. I don’t want to seek approval from anyone anymore.

After seeing that post, I told myself that I am going to reclaim my confidence. I want to be described as intimidating, confidence, and outgoing. Yeah, I’m quiet because I don’t have much to say but that doesn’t mean I want to lack confidence. People can be quiet and still give a strong aura.


An old friend told me that when you turn 25 and hit the “quarter-life crisis” you start to doubt everything and the confidence starts to wither away but it picks back up later.

I’m ready to pick up my confidence and erase my doubts. I’m tired of trying to please everyone and seek other people’s validating when just two years ago I was a firecracker. I’m tired of being afraid to live my life. I’m tired of being afraid to tell people my thoughts and feelings in fear of what they might think of me.

I’m ready to be my self again, and I’m reading to take a shit ton of videos and selfies.